President Jaguar
President Jaguar, another early contributor to the Too Late Show who later left the show due to creative differences and then ultimately became the show's arch nemesis, quickly rose to power once the Psychedelic Police Force began to recognize the danger presented by Dr. Crow and the TLN. His insider knowledge, as well as his willingness and extraordinary success in using experimental intelligence enhancing drugs produced by Mega Harvard LLC that were only ever produced in miniscule quantities due to the risk of their molecular structure becoming public knowledge, made him a prime candidate for recruitment as an informant by the PPF. The fact that he was already known as President Jaguar before being elected President of the United States in 2040, is a matter of much confusion to those unfamiliar with the intricacies of retrocausality. He developed the first IQ test capable of discerning between IQs of more than 200, and is widely thought to have the highest IQ of any human ever. But not even the President can untangle a hyperconspiracy.
Early Career
An early contributor to the Too Late Show, he later left due to creative differences and then ultimately became the show's arch nemesis
As the Psychedelic Police Force began to recognize the danger presented by Dr. Crow and the TLN. His insider knowledge, as well as his willingness and extraordinary success in using experimental intelligence enhancing drugs produced by Mega Harvard LLC that were only ever produced in miniscule quantities due to the risk of their molecular structure becoming public knowledge, made him a prime candidate for recruitment as an informant by the PPF.
Election & Inauguration
President Jaguar was first elected in 2040 and will continue to be elected every 4 years until the heat death of the universe.
The year-long coronation ritual starts with both Democratic and Republican caucuses declaring President Jaguar their nominee, asserting that "no other candidate exists." The often follows a series of "debates" where the President delivers highly scripted witticisms against an assortment of aging comedians who are humanely euthanized at the end of the performance. President Jaguar then dons a robe of royal purple, combining the red and blue of the major parties.
Prior to certification, large crowds are expected to come forward hurling accusations at the president, before "the Electors" declare that he is not only innocent of all charges, but is in fact a divine being. An act of political theater, the sweeping aside of allegations functions as a rite of purification, the number of women airing accusations at the president demonstrating his virility. By the 25th century, this ritual will have devolved into an orgy with the accusers broadcast directly the brains of the entire planet.
Presidency
(The Presidency of President Jaguar is everlasting and all encompassing, it includes all that you can possibly experience or dream, and is thus beyond the scope of this page)
Intelligence
President Jaguar has developed the first IQ test capable of discerning between IQs of more than 200, and is widely thought to have the highest IQ of any human ever. But not even the President can untangle a hyperconspiracy.
Lord Egregore
Burke proposes that the ascension of President Jaguar corresponds with his embodiment of Lord Egregore, the Zeitgeist Eternal. This is supported by his banning of memes, and his mathematically unprecedented approval ratings.
Other theorists accept that Jaguar is the true persona and avatar or Lord Egregore, but have various theories on if this happened before or after his election. Girard locates his apotheosis to some point during the President Elect period, but prior to his inauguration. Warner Suggests that Lord Egregore is still not fully manifest in Jaguar, due to the existence of hyperconspiracies.
There does exist a fringe mythicist school, who believes that Jaguar was entirely fictional prior to his presidency, and incarnated bodily through retrocausality.